Thursday, August 18, 2016

Back Again. . .

                     Now, when I say back again, I don't mean that I am starting all over, but just back to blogging. I have be doing really good. I still haven't had any soda or energy drinks. I started drinking my coffee black ( still not use to it but I am getting there.) I have ate out twice in the month and a half that I have been doing this, but both times I ordered only what I knew I could have. After feeling the way that I did when I ate the ice cream I decided that I couldn't do that again. I hated that feeling! So, I have been eating super clean, trying to drink a lot more water.

                     The only thing that I can't figure out, is that I have been doing so good, that after losing 17 pounds, the weight just stopped coming off, and even started to creep back up. Can someone please explain this to me? Another thing that I am trying to figure out is that how much protein I should be eating, and how many calories? I am just so confused on how much I should be eating to continue to lose weight. I feel like that eating right, is the hardest part. I don't know what to eat, how much to eat, when I should be eating. Like breakfast, how many times do I have to eat oatmeal? What Can I switch it up with? How often should I be exercising? What kind of exercises can I do without a gym membership? It is so over whelming that I get stressed out. When I get stressed, I get depressed and then I just want to give up. That is what would happen to me before, I would give up, and I would just continue to eat whatever I wanted. I am glad that I haven't given up yet. There has been days where I just was like, I am done. I can't take the stress anymore, but then I would tell myself that I just have to get through this feeling and remember why I am doing it. I agree 100% that motivation is what gets you started but determination is what keeps you going. I want this so bad, that I can taste it, and it tastes so sweet (not sweet as in cake or cookies sweet).


            I really missed blogging, I have thought about it every night, but when I go to start blogging, something comes up, and with the shift change at work, it has thrown me off like crazy, but like I said I am back and ready to share my emotions with anyone who is willing to read!



Final note before I leave you, PLEASE Remember to never give up, and that one moment of weakness is not worth ruining everything you have accomplished so far. We are a work in progress!





Saturday, August 6, 2016

The Struggles Are Real. . .

           Well, it has been awhile since I have been on here to blog. I have missed it a lot! It has been a whole week! I want to start off by saying that I am down, 12 pounds, from where I started. It may not seem like a lot but 12 pounds in 3 weeks is not bad. I am trying really hard to stay on track. Which is what I really want to talk about here. For the last 3 weeks I have been doing really good. I haven't had any treats, like candy, soda, or my biggest weakness, MONSTER ENERGY. Which, I am really proud of myself for that. Here is where the struggle gets real. Last night, (8/5/2016) I went to see Suicide Squad. I told myself that I was not going to indulge in popcorn or candy. Well, when I got there and it was in front of me, I could help but eat it, it being both popcorn and candy. The fun does not stop there though. We went to T.G.I Friday, and I had 10 traditional wings. I felt completely like I let me self down. I told myself that I would do better tomorrow. So, tomorrow comes around, and we have a company picnic to attend. Well, I did really good with the food, only having pulled pork with honey mustard,and fruit. Well, then they bring out the ice cream truck, and of course I told my self that I was going to get something that I can have. So, they had these frozen Ice with a small amount of ice cream, so I decided to have that. I only had a single serving of the soft serve ice cream, so I figured that it was not to bad, but still not great. After, leaving I once again felt let down, and frustrated.


          Now, that I know that I feel that way after eating what I am not supposed to, it will give me that strength to keep myself from making those bad decisions. I truly still want this healthier life style, and I think that it really shows, because before, I would have just said SCREW IT all. I am more determined than ever to get to where I want to be!


          Backing
up a few days. On, Thursday we walked to the High School, and we were going to walk the track. I decided that I wanted to see how far I could run without stopping. I made it 1/4th of a mile. I haven't ran in almost 3 years, it was really hard but I did it. I felt great! After that I decided to run bleachers. I did 4 sets (up and down is one set). It is a start, and I am going to get back to being able to do bleachers and then run a mile.


     Please remember that, because times get hard and you slip up, doesn't mean that you give up, it means that you have to go at it the next day and remember why you are doing it. That's how I am going to go from Fluff To Buff.











Friday, July 29, 2016

Final Day. . .

    Well, today was the final day of tracking my daily intake. I really enjoyed it because I knew it was keeping me accountable. Today was especially hard, because if there isn't one food that I love that my work makes it is PIZZA! Everyone kept telling me that I was crazy for not eating it, and kept telling me that I should allow myself 1 piece. I just kept thinking that that is what I have always done. I have allowed myself to "cheat" and the next thing I know I figure since I already screwed up, I might as well, keep going and that I can always start over. For me that does not work, because if I keep going back to the foods that I shouldn't eat, I feel like crap and just go right back to my old habits. Now, if I stick with what I am doing, where I avoid the temptations, and just eat the foods that I can have, I can keep going in the right direction.


    Breakfast: Oatmeal w/ granola
    Snack: Apple with Lime and chili powder
    Lunch: Salad w/ cottage cheese
    Snack: Quest Bar (Cookies and Cream) and a cheese stick
    Dinner: Grilled Chicken with a cucumber and tomato salad w/ balsamic
    Snack: Apple with Lime and Chili Powder


   So, yesterday we decided to go on a walk on the green belt, it is really pretty greenbelt, the path is covered in trees and runs by the river. I will have to take a picture to share. Anyways, you have to cross major roads along this path. We just crossed and I heard a car honking, and turned around and noticed that these two young boys were on their bike starting to cross, when the car stopped to let them pass, the car behind that one, decided not to wait and went around the stopped car and blew through the crosswalk, inches from hitting the kids on the bike, I was baffled by this person to not even stop. We, continued our walk, and when we got back to the same cross walk, we started to cross because there were no cars, coming. Well I looked to my right and noticed a truck that turned the corner and started to speed up. I thought for sure that he saw us and that he was going to stop, but he sped up like he was going to try to beat us to the cross walk, I jumped in front my girlfriend and the baby fearing that he was going to hit us and then at the last minute he just slams on his breaks and comes with in 4 feet of hitting us. I was freaking out, and I was yelling at him, and all he did was told me to keep going. I was seriously so mad, and freaked out because it all happened so fast. I thought for sure we were going to get hit. It was terrifying. Every time I shut my eyes all I can see is this truck coming at me. I don't like that at all! I would like to say that I want everyone to get out and be active, but please be safe, If you are driving, please pay attention. It is not worth killing someone.

   So, end of the night. It is Friday and I just want everyone to stay strong, so here is a quote for some motivation:


Thursday, July 28, 2016

Temptations. . .

Lately, I feel like temptations have been coming from left and right. Yesterday, doughnuts, and today birthday cake at work? I was successful in denying it! Which I am pretty proud of myself because before I wouldn't even think twice about it.  

Breakfast: Apple with Cinnamon
Lunch : salad with smoked turkey and cottage cheese
Snack: cheese stick and apple with lime and chili powder
Dinner: turkey burger no bun and broccoli
Snack: Quest Bar  (cookies and cream)

We also went for a 1 hour walk. I do have a story about the walk, that I will post tomorrow .

So, now I will leave you with some motivation to keep going!

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Just another day. . .

Well, today was a good day. I got to see family that came in from out of town. It was nice for them to meet the baby. Of course they ordered in pizza. My girlfriend and I both declined.  We decided to make dinner at home. I once again did not have time to get up and make breakfast. I did pretty good though!

Breakfast: Missed
Snack: Apple with Cinnamon
Lunch: Chicken on a salad with salsa and sour cream.
Snack: Quest Bar
Dinner: Steak with Corn and baked potato

I just feel like like I go to long without eating. I feel weak mentally and physically. It makes me want to go get something that I know I shouldn't.  It is just a really hard habit to break. At least I did it!

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Meal. . .

Well, it is that time of night again. Let me start off by saying that my daughter  (5 weeks old ) decided to that it was time to party. I didn't get to bed till 345am. I had to get up at 6am which gives me 20 minutes to get ready. Needless to say that I wasn't able to start my day off the way I wanted to.  But as I promised myself here day of eating.

Breakfast: NOTHING
Lunch: Cottage cheese and a salad
Snack: Quest Bar  (cookies and cream is by far my favorite)
Dinner: scrambled eggs with diced ham, mushrooms, and cheese with 1 slice of Daves Killer Bread multi-grain toast

It wasn't that great, but it wasn't bad either. I just wished that I had time to eat breakfast. Tomorrow my plan is to get up and eat oatmeal or something like that. I am proud of myself because today my coworkers wife brought in Krispy kream doughnuts, and I refused! I just couldn't do it! I was tempted but I had to tell myself that I am stronger than that! Which is successful in my books! :)

As always, I will leave you with some motivation:

Monday, July 25, 2016

Goodbye...?

         Tonight a really good friend of ours (my girlfriend and I) is moving to Washington Saturday and they came to say goodbye. They brought dinner and I may have had a few drinks, nothing horrible. Just some Bud Light and a couple of shots, I know it is not the healthiest but, him and I have always drank together, so it was nice taking a last shot with him. I really am going to miss them, that is for sure.

     As promised I would post what I ate for the day.

Breakfast: Oatmeal w/granola and blueberries.
Snack: Quest Protein Bar
Lunch: Turkey Burger w/ Wild Jasmine Rice and Cabbage
Snack: String Cheese and Grapes
Dinner: Hamburger with Cheese NO bun, Mushrooms, steamed green beans, and a half serving of tots.


I think over all I did really good. Like I said I had 2 beers and a couple of shots, but that was really it!

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Struggles. . .

           When you step on the scale and you see that you have only dropped, 6oz the struggle becomes real. I felt like I was doing a lot better than that. I started eating better at work, by avoiding all the cooked foods and eating only at the salad bar. I have found some better snacks to take like hummus and celery (thank you Judy). I found these protein bars that are supposedly really good for you (not convinced yet) that really help with my sweet cravings. My girlfriend and I were talking and we think that because yesterday we didn't eat enough calories, it hurt us. I can say that I haven't had any soda this past week, I think that I am finally over the withdrawals, because I no longer crave it.


            This coming up week I have got to get my crap together, I want to eat as clean as possible, and set a goal where I eat breakfast every morning because I usually don't and by the time lunch comes around I am so hungry that I sometimes over eat. I want to do whatever I can to make sure that I am doing what is healthy.

           I want to be honest here,   I am 26 years old and I weigh 303.2 pounds, my heaviest was 311.8, I do not want to see those numbers continue to go up. The hardest part is wanting the change to happen over night, and logically I know that it is unrealistic, but I get so upset over the fact that it felt like I become this heavy just as quick. I feel like that I have no idea what I am doing, or how to do it, that I start getting stressed out. I keep thinking to myself "is this even going to work? Am I going to lose weight doing this?" What if it doesn't and I then gain weight and have an even bigger hill to climb. It honestly scares me, especially when I am wanting it so badly. I wish there was just this book, a super simple book that told you EXACTLY what to eat, and EXACTLY what to do. I would be like okay I can do this. The only issue though is the fact that everyone is different, and if it worked for one person it doesn't mean that it is guaranteed to work for me, and trying to find what works for me is the hardest part. Do I just keep doing different things until I get it right? The frustrating part is that I was able to do all this at one point. I was at a good weight, I was running, I was working out, and I felt great, but I lost it all. I not only lost it, but I forgot it. I forgot the way to live a healthy life, and that is what sucks.

           So, here is my pledge. I am going to keep track of EVERYTHING I eat this week, and I am going to post it here, that way I can keep myself accountable. Also, I am going to prep my breakfast the night before, if I can, so that I can have plenty of time to eat it, before I have to leave. I am going to set a goal to lose at least 5 pounds this week, which is completely doable.  With all that being said, I am going to blog every night this week to help me stay focused even if it is just to go over my day and track my food.


For now, I am going to leave you with this:







Monday, July 18, 2016

Keep Going. . .

                  Well, today was another day down. It is really hard to stay on track when your work provides free meals. Every day is something different, but the one thing I like is the fact that they have a salad bar everyday. I think that I would honestly not do as well, if it was only the food they cooked. The only thing I wish they had were more options for salad dressing. All they have is jalapeno ranch, ranch, and blue cheese. I think that I will start taking my own. Today, I had a cup of cottage cheese and a salad. I avoided the cooked food (lasagna with a layer of grease). NO THANKS!

                I also want to start taking my own snacks. The little store inside my work only sales junk food. Every time I go in there I get extremely tempted to buy cheezeits and energy drinks. I really try to stay out of there, except to refill my water bottle. So, I think if I go to buy snacks to keep at my desk, it would help me out a lot, also will help keep me on track. 

               I went grocery shopping and it makes me so mad that to eat healthy, it cost almost twice has much as other food. I can buy junk food and spend $50 and make it last for 2 to 3 weeks, but it costs $40 for half a week.  Its almost ridiculous, then we wonder why it is so hard to lose weight. No one can afford it. I would love to be able to shop at places like Whole Foods, but it is SO expensive. Also, it is expensive to be heavier, because for XL clothes they add on $3 to $5 dollars depending how big of shirt your need. I have just been so bothered by this, I have never really noticed it, until recently. I hope that I will be able to just keep going so that I don't have to worry about these things. 


                 So, I think that once a week I am going to do a recipe blog. I will share pictures as well, 
I really enjoy those types of blogs so, thought I would do my own. It's that time of night again, I will leave you with a quote....good night world!

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Failure?

        I hate the word failure. It is such a negative word. It is how I feel though, and it really sucks. I used to drink a 12 pack of soda a day, now this was back when I first started trying to lose weight a few years ago, I stopped drinking soda. I made it almost 2 years with maybe only a drink here and there. Recently, I started drinking it again and I feel like I could drink a whole case. I crave it all the time. I forgot how addictive it was. I am trying really hard to only drink water, so I bought some flavor packets that are sweetened with stevia, in hopes that it will help transition back to just water.

        Having a baby and trying to find time to exercise, like go for walks or anything like that, is really hard. I thought that I could just put her in her carseat and stroller and just go, nope definitely not the case. She needs fed, she needs a diaper change or she is fussy. I wouldn't change it for the world, but it is a challenge. I  am hoping to start walking on my lunch break, I just need to figure out how to still eat a healthy lunch and get a enough time to walk, even if it's just a mile.

      Also, I am struggling with meal planning. I have no idea of what kind of foods to buy, what to eat, or anything like that. I wish I could get some help on this.

       Well, the baby and the gf are asleep so I should probably do the same. Good night and before I go, I want to leave you with a quote! :)

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Intro Blog-Round 2,3,4,5?

            Hi, my name is Tim (AKA Fluffy) and I am a foodaholic. I am 26 years old and over 300lbs. I have been heavy most of my life. I did reach a point where I was doing really good with my eating and exercising a lot, and had gotten down to 200lbs. I felt amazing, I was able to run then right after that I could run bleachers. I was in pretty good shape, but of course I relapsed. I started eating again and couldn't stop and now here I am over 300lbs in 3 years. I have tried many fade diets that failed. I can't even walk to the mailbox without losing my breath. I want to be able to run again, I want to be able to do all sorts of things, that I can't do now, because of my weight.

           Recently, I just had a daughter. She is now 2 weeks old. Becoming a father was the most amazing thing that I have ever experienced. I absolutely love her. After becoming a father it has made me realize a lot of things. Everyone knows the risks of being overweight, just to name a few: High Blood Pressure, Stroke, Diabetes, Heart Disease, and Sleep Apnea. According to National Institutes of Health, obesity is the second leading cause of Preventable Deaths. If I can prevent this, why wouldn't I? Like I mentioned above, becoming a father it has made me realize all this, and that I need to be here for her. I want to be able to play with her, and run around with her, I don't want to be one of those dads that have to sit on the bench watching there child play because he is so out of shape that it physically hurts to move. I want her to have a healthy relationship with food, I don't want her to struggle the same way I do. Now, I know that with having a new baby it is going to be a little harder to find time cook my own meals, but I will have to find the time because I AM DONE. 

            That is why I am here again, it may be my second round, third round, even my fifth round but I am still here fighting. I just keep telling myself that it is not how many times your fall down but how many times you get back up that matters the most. I figured to help me going into the right direction I am going to list out my "goals" so that I can put it out there so that I am more likely to hold myself accountable. 

GOALS: 
               Cook at Home
               Drink More Water
               Cut Out Soda/Energy Drinks
               Cut Out Dairy
               Lose at least 125lbs
               Stop Drinking Alcohol
              Walk 5 nights a week




That is just to name a few. I plan on blogging at list 3 times a week if not more. I want to be able to come here and be honest.


So, here I leave you with a motivation quote :