Monday, May 8, 2017

This Is It Moment

         Well, here I am again. I am back. Back again. I have been crazy busy, and I feel like I can never sit down to just blog. I will be doing something and say this would be a blog worthy moment, but then I forget what I was even doing, and then not even blog about it. I have had this title saved has a draft for a few weeks trying to get the whole blog into words. It has been something that I have heard a lot lately. I started thinking about what my "this is it" moment. I remember playing with my daughter and I remember that I was just walking around the living room with her, and I had a hard time catching my breath. I started thinking that, she is going to be getting more mobile and wanting to get out and play more, and how am I suppose to do this if  I can't even walk her around the house.

      I realized that I needed to change my lifestyle, and I have talked about how I wanted to be here for my daughter, and how things needed to change. I was never really concerned for myself, like I knew that I needed to take care of myself for my daughter, but I never thought to take care of myself for ME. It is really hard to focus on that when your mind is telling you that you want all these foods that you really shouldn't be eating. I know it is going to be hard, but no one said it was going to be easy!

     For the last couple of days I have been super sick and have lost like 6 pounds in 3 days. Not healthy but it is a good start. I am wanting this more than anything to just keep going and do better each day. I am starting with small attainable goals and then moving forward. I have so many plans but when you don't see the scale moving fast enough, you really start asking yourself if you will ever get to where you are wanting to go, or think that it could be a couple of years before you see the finished product. I have to learn that it is the small steps that get you to the bigger goals. So, I am going to make a list of small goals I want to accomplish.

1. Ride my bike to the grocery store when needing small items for meals for 1 week

2. Eat clean whole food for 1 week

3. Drink More Water

4. Lose 7 pounds in 2 weeks

     This is just a start. I will add come up with more. If you have any suggestions I would like to hear them. I can use all the help I can! Until than, let me leave you all with my quote of the day....

Monday, February 20, 2017

Meal Planning and Other Stuff

              Losing all motivation. How come sometimes you can feel completely motivated to do something, but then just not do it? I talked about this in my last blog that I get motivated to do something but at the same time I have not motivation to start. I really started thinking about it, and I think if you don't know the first step, it becomes frustrating.  I hate feeling like I have no idea what to do. I have done this before, I have lost weight many times. I have gained weight many times, it is easy to do? I can't tell you how to get fit, or how to lose weight, but I can tell you how to gain weight. I see a huge problem with that. I'm sure that  I am not the only one that struggles with this, everyone knows what causes weight gain, and we all have the will power to do so. No one thinks twice about what they are eating when they are not concentrating on "healthy" eating. If I am not carefully I can catch myself with a bag of chips and anything else that  I shouldn't be eating.  I never expected it to be easy I just wish that I could have a more positive experience, and I know that  I will get there, but I just want to stay honest and not make it seem like losing weight is the easiest thing in the world, and that it takes little to no effort to do so. It takes a lot of motivation and even more determination.

              I know that for me to get started I need to meal plan. I find it difficult to meal plan, because there has to be more than just chicken, rice, and veggies. I seriously struggle with finding "healthy" meals to prep. I have been watching a lot of videos on YouTube, that has helped a lot.
I went and bought 5lbs of rice and a bag of chicken and cooked a few days worth of lunch. Like I said, I need to find more than just chicken and rice. I am going to study a lot more.

            Bottom line is that I am willing to do whatever it is to get myself in better shape. Not only for myself but for my daughters. I don't want to be the dad that has to sit down all the time because I can't catch my breath. I am almost there now. I just have to do better, and make small changes, that way I can see better results.  I am glad that spring is coming, because I am looking forward to bike riding, walking outside, and finding new trails to hike. I just need to by a jogging stroller and one of the carts to pull behind my bike.

            I hope to be able to blog more. I just am getting use to coming up with topics.
I think that I am definitely going to start doing recipe blogs, that would be fun.
Anyways, here is your daily dose of motivation and don't forget that anyone can go from Fluff to Buff!

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Lack of Motivation

     Every night I set my alarm for 30 minutes earlier, so that  I can get up and "workout". Of course by the time the alarm goes off I just think, do I really want to get up right now, or do I want to stay in bed and sleep for an extra 30 minutes. I always choose to sleep in. I just do not have the drive to get up and exercise. I feel the lack of motivation, even though I have every intention to get up.  Does anyone have tips that might help with that? Maybe vitamins, or maybe drinking a pre-workout first thing in the morning and see if it will give me the energy? Crazy thing is back when I was working out regularly, I could get up at 4am and go to the gym without any hesitation, good luck if  I do that now!
    At least this morning when I woke up I was able to pack my snacks and my lunch so I could avoid the vending machine of death!  I was eating out of it everyday, and we all know that they never stalk it with anything healthy. I can eat 5 bags of the sausage gravy potato chips! I am not going to lie, I cam awful close to it, but I stopped at 3 bags! It has been 3 days I believe since I have touched the vending machine. My plan is to save my money for good healthy food, like fresh fruits!
   Today I woke up and packed my lunch and snacks as following:

Breakfast: Shake
Snack: package of Hot Buffalo Tuna (plain) with Halos and a Fiber One Bar (sounds like a lot but this was spread out over a couple hours)
Lunch:  Ground Beef with homemade Taco Seasoning over Lettuce w/ Sour Cream and Salsa and Cottage Cheese
Snack: Fiber One Bar with some Halos.

   I haven't decided what I am going to do for dinner today, but I think after dinner I am going to go for a walk at the local mall, that way I at lease get some exercise that way too!
   Also, I think that  I am finally ready to post pictures!

Motivational quote: "Don't stop when you're tired. STOP when you are DONE." -unknown

Tuesday, January 31, 2017

At It Again!!

          Here I am again. I has been a few months since I have posted on here. A lot has been going on and it has kept me from sitting down for long periods of time to blog about my day. I think that I have finally got in the grove of things (I usually say this and then something new happens to just throw me me off). As far as the changes in my life, I started a new job, I have gained most of the weight I lost back, and I would like to proudly say that we are expecting our second child, in just 4 short months. 
I already have 7 month, so with them being so close together "YAY!".  I am excited but it has been a little bit of a struggle getting use to.  We are having another girl, and so it is really nice already having everything that we need, except for needing another car seat and a double stroller/double jogging stroller.  Also, like I mentioned  I started a new job. I absolutely love it. It has been the best job I have had by far. I can't deal with a stressful job. It definitely does not help with my health! 

         Which is the next thing that I wanted to talk about, my health. I have been struggling to get on track with my eating. I can do it for a couple of weeks and then just relapse, and the next thing I know I have gained back most of the weight, if not more than I just worked so hard to lose. Then I just get super depressed and then I binge eat. It is like a snowball affect for me. One thing after another. It's getting pretty old.
Having gained back to almost 300 lbs it has been really depressing for me. I think about all these ways I can get this weight off but actually doing it stresses me out like no one's business. While I am at work I can do just fine, I normally take a package of tuna and some fruit and I do just fine, but as soon as I get home, I start eating like crazy. I usually have pretty healthy stuff at home but it never sounds good so I always just run to the closest fast food. I know that I can't be doing this but no matter what I do I can't stop myself.

     So far today I have done relatively good. I am going to make a better choice for dinner tonight, and actually eating at home

So, here begins a new journey to a healthier and better me! Also, if anyone has a recipe for infused water please let me know. I want to start taking that to work!

As always I end with a little motivation:  "Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change"-Shaycarl

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Back Again. . .

                     Now, when I say back again, I don't mean that I am starting all over, but just back to blogging. I have be doing really good. I still haven't had any soda or energy drinks. I started drinking my coffee black ( still not use to it but I am getting there.) I have ate out twice in the month and a half that I have been doing this, but both times I ordered only what I knew I could have. After feeling the way that I did when I ate the ice cream I decided that I couldn't do that again. I hated that feeling! So, I have been eating super clean, trying to drink a lot more water.

                     The only thing that I can't figure out, is that I have been doing so good, that after losing 17 pounds, the weight just stopped coming off, and even started to creep back up. Can someone please explain this to me? Another thing that I am trying to figure out is that how much protein I should be eating, and how many calories? I am just so confused on how much I should be eating to continue to lose weight. I feel like that eating right, is the hardest part. I don't know what to eat, how much to eat, when I should be eating. Like breakfast, how many times do I have to eat oatmeal? What Can I switch it up with? How often should I be exercising? What kind of exercises can I do without a gym membership? It is so over whelming that I get stressed out. When I get stressed, I get depressed and then I just want to give up. That is what would happen to me before, I would give up, and I would just continue to eat whatever I wanted. I am glad that I haven't given up yet. There has been days where I just was like, I am done. I can't take the stress anymore, but then I would tell myself that I just have to get through this feeling and remember why I am doing it. I agree 100% that motivation is what gets you started but determination is what keeps you going. I want this so bad, that I can taste it, and it tastes so sweet (not sweet as in cake or cookies sweet).

            I really missed blogging, I have thought about it every night, but when I go to start blogging, something comes up, and with the shift change at work, it has thrown me off like crazy, but like I said I am back and ready to share my emotions with anyone who is willing to read!

Final note before I leave you, PLEASE Remember to never give up, and that one moment of weakness is not worth ruining everything you have accomplished so far. We are a work in progress!

Saturday, August 6, 2016

The Struggles Are Real. . .

           Well, it has been awhile since I have been on here to blog. I have missed it a lot! It has been a whole week! I want to start off by saying that I am down, 12 pounds, from where I started. It may not seem like a lot but 12 pounds in 3 weeks is not bad. I am trying really hard to stay on track. Which is what I really want to talk about here. For the last 3 weeks I have been doing really good. I haven't had any treats, like candy, soda, or my biggest weakness, MONSTER ENERGY. Which, I am really proud of myself for that. Here is where the struggle gets real. Last night, (8/5/2016) I went to see Suicide Squad. I told myself that I was not going to indulge in popcorn or candy. Well, when I got there and it was in front of me, I could help but eat it, it being both popcorn and candy. The fun does not stop there though. We went to T.G.I Friday, and I had 10 traditional wings. I felt completely like I let me self down. I told myself that I would do better tomorrow. So, tomorrow comes around, and we have a company picnic to attend. Well, I did really good with the food, only having pulled pork with honey mustard,and fruit. Well, then they bring out the ice cream truck, and of course I told my self that I was going to get something that I can have. So, they had these frozen Ice with a small amount of ice cream, so I decided to have that. I only had a single serving of the soft serve ice cream, so I figured that it was not to bad, but still not great. After, leaving I once again felt let down, and frustrated.

          Now, that I know that I feel that way after eating what I am not supposed to, it will give me that strength to keep myself from making those bad decisions. I truly still want this healthier life style, and I think that it really shows, because before, I would have just said SCREW IT all. I am more determined than ever to get to where I want to be!

up a few days. On, Thursday we walked to the High School, and we were going to walk the track. I decided that I wanted to see how far I could run without stopping. I made it 1/4th of a mile. I haven't ran in almost 3 years, it was really hard but I did it. I felt great! After that I decided to run bleachers. I did 4 sets (up and down is one set). It is a start, and I am going to get back to being able to do bleachers and then run a mile.

     Please remember that, because times get hard and you slip up, doesn't mean that you give up, it means that you have to go at it the next day and remember why you are doing it. That's how I am going to go from Fluff To Buff.

Friday, July 29, 2016

Final Day. . .

    Well, today was the final day of tracking my daily intake. I really enjoyed it because I knew it was keeping me accountable. Today was especially hard, because if there isn't one food that I love that my work makes it is PIZZA! Everyone kept telling me that I was crazy for not eating it, and kept telling me that I should allow myself 1 piece. I just kept thinking that that is what I have always done. I have allowed myself to "cheat" and the next thing I know I figure since I already screwed up, I might as well, keep going and that I can always start over. For me that does not work, because if I keep going back to the foods that I shouldn't eat, I feel like crap and just go right back to my old habits. Now, if I stick with what I am doing, where I avoid the temptations, and just eat the foods that I can have, I can keep going in the right direction.

    Breakfast: Oatmeal w/ granola
    Snack: Apple with Lime and chili powder
    Lunch: Salad w/ cottage cheese
    Snack: Quest Bar (Cookies and Cream) and a cheese stick
    Dinner: Grilled Chicken with a cucumber and tomato salad w/ balsamic
    Snack: Apple with Lime and Chili Powder

   So, yesterday we decided to go on a walk on the green belt, it is really pretty greenbelt, the path is covered in trees and runs by the river. I will have to take a picture to share. Anyways, you have to cross major roads along this path. We just crossed and I heard a car honking, and turned around and noticed that these two young boys were on their bike starting to cross, when the car stopped to let them pass, the car behind that one, decided not to wait and went around the stopped car and blew through the crosswalk, inches from hitting the kids on the bike, I was baffled by this person to not even stop. We, continued our walk, and when we got back to the same cross walk, we started to cross because there were no cars, coming. Well I looked to my right and noticed a truck that turned the corner and started to speed up. I thought for sure that he saw us and that he was going to stop, but he sped up like he was going to try to beat us to the cross walk, I jumped in front my girlfriend and the baby fearing that he was going to hit us and then at the last minute he just slams on his breaks and comes with in 4 feet of hitting us. I was freaking out, and I was yelling at him, and all he did was told me to keep going. I was seriously so mad, and freaked out because it all happened so fast. I thought for sure we were going to get hit. It was terrifying. Every time I shut my eyes all I can see is this truck coming at me. I don't like that at all! I would like to say that I want everyone to get out and be active, but please be safe, If you are driving, please pay attention. It is not worth killing someone.

   So, end of the night. It is Friday and I just want everyone to stay strong, so here is a quote for some motivation: